Don’t be afraid to ask for help this International Men's Day

Former Ambulance Victoria (AV) paramedic Malcolm Hunting has opened up about his mental health battle and the positive impact of seeking professional support, following the loss of his wife and calling time on his 45-year paramedicine career.

This International Men’s Day (19 November), Mal is calling for others to also take the brave step of asking for help.

Mal began his ambulance career in Melbourne, before moving to the rural town of Edenhope in 1993.

He loved working in a small community, where everyone knew each other, but it made stepping away from pre-hospital emergency care all the more challenging.

“My patients were my neighbours and friends. Everybody knew me as the paramedic and my wife as the ambo’s wife. I was proud of the uniform, the job and what I did,” Mal said.

“When it all finished, it was a bit of a loss of identity. People still knew me, but it wasn’t the same.”

Mal retired in 2022. At the time, his wife Lesley was unwell and, sadly, earlier this year she passed away.

“Lesley was the one who encouraged me to pursue a paramedicine career. She saw something in me. From then on, she was always my rock,” Mal said.

“She was my support, my mentor, my confidant. Without her and her drive to push me to be the best I could be, I really don’t know how far I would have gone. Bottom line, I loved her and she loved me. It was pretty special.”

Throughout his more-than-four-decade career, Lesley had encouraged Mal to be proactive about his mental health and to speak to a psychologist when needed.

After his retirement, a tragic event involving a former colleague deeply affected him and made him reflect on his own wellbeing. Mal and one of his daughters, who is an Ambulance Community Officer (ACO) with AV, went along to a get-together where impacted colleagues and friends could speak with counsellors.

“It was there that I admitted for the first time that I was feeling symptoms of depression and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD),” Mal said.

“It still took me a while to make that next step and I’m now seeing a psychologist and I’m finding good things are coming from it.”

International Men's Day is a global awareness day celebrating the positive value men bring to the world and raising awareness of men’s wellbeing.

Mal said he hopes his story inspires other men to ask for help and foster strong relationships with their loved ones.

“Men historically have the ‘she’ll be right’ attitude but often we’re not. Men are expected to be strong but we’re humans. We cry, we feel sad, we feel uncomfortable,” Mal said.

“If you’re not feeling right, then the chances are, you’re not right. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and see a psychologist.

“My main advice is to talk to people, listen to what your loved ones are telling you and don’t bottle it up.

“And don’t forget to give your partner and your kids a hug. You don’t know what the future or even the next 10 minutes are going to hold. Whenever I go out the door, I always try to remember to say ‘I love you, see you later’.”

If you need help, you can access professional mental health support by contacting your doctor or local health service, or calling Beyond Blue on 1300 224 636.

Free telephone and online counselling is available for Australian men at MensLine Australia on 1300 78 99 78.

For immediate crisis support, call Lifeline on 13 11 14.